When we were almost a year into our fertility journey, I shared our struggles with my mum. Until this point, the question “Is IVF right for me?” didn’t really cross my mind.
“With IVF it’s fast.”
“Don’t worry, it’ll happen soon and if not, you’ll just do IVF.“
“First we want to dig deeper and look for answers plus I don’t feel like I want to go through IVF.“
“What, why not, you’d be wasting your time, with IVF it’s fast.“
“Mum, it’s not that simple, IVF doesn’t always work and it’s mentally and physically challenging.“
What I’m trying to say with this, many think it’s so simple. They’ll just take some of your eggs, then fertilize one and boom, here’s your baby.
At our fertility clinic it seemed they had the same mind set and approach. After a year of trying we were told: “Keep trying for 6 more months.”
Is IVF right for me?
6 months later the doctor handed us a brochure with information on IUI. When we said this wasn’t what we wanted and wanted to have more tests done instead, he refused. The doctor wrote a little note to our case: refuse to collaborate. It was these words, the lack of empathy and willingness to help that made me cry in the car on our way back home. We felt like we had no options left and the idea of trying IUI actually started creeping in. I started wondering: “Is IUI for me? Is IVF for me?”. I didn’t know what else to do.
However, I took some time to process what’s happened and realized the idea of doing IUI or IVF didn’t resonate with me at all. We never went back to the clinic. I also decided once I’d get pregnant I wouldn’t give birth in that hospital (spoiler alert, I didn’t, I gave birth at home 😊).
Are you feeling pushed?
Unfortunately, I see it too often these days that women are not given enough options and are offered to go straight into IUI or IVF. While it might work, it often takes more attempts, it takes a huge toll on your mind and body and your relationship. It is challenging in every way and you might need months to recover. While it is a great tool for many women, it shouldn’t be the 1st choice.
Maybe you feel like IUI or IVF is the right option for you. And that’s completely fine, too! All I want for you is to choose the path that is right for you, the path you truly feel is right for you and you don’t walk it just because of some external pressure. Take the time to sit down with your feelings and emotions and listen to your inner voice. I’ve put a video on my YT channel on this topic as well, so you can join me and tune in.
No matter where you are on your fertility journey, whether it is an IVF journey, struggling with PCOS or trying on your own, I am here to help you optimize your health to improve your chances of bringing your baby into your home. Reach out to me so we can work together on building your new family. 💕